First year of marriage: what’s going on and how to make it more successful?
The first year of marriage is an unforgettable period. Naturally, each pair will have their own “ups and downs” during this period. There will be unexpected trials and stupid mistakes. At the same time, there will be many fun and happy days. But for most pairs, there are common denominators that are useful to know about in advance. Therefore, any person who is interested in how marriage can change their lives should be aware of the following things that will arise in the first year of living together with a loved one.
How should the first year of marriage go?
It is possible that when you first started a relationship with someone, or even lived together, you probably did not have to do such difficult teamwork as in the first year of family life. Basically, it all starts with the chores around the house: cooking, cleaning, taking care of the house, and so on. When you were dating, you didn’t have to worry too much about where your partner spent money, how often he cleans the room, how long he takes a shower, and much more.
Now, most of the time you are together, and you have to share tasks around the house, tell each other your schedule, discuss the budget, share your expenses, and if you already have children, then parenting and childcare is connected here. After all, it is also about trust and understanding. In the first year of marriage, you need to build a relationship so that you can trust each other 100%. This can be a problem for many people. Because they did not expect so many tasks and possible problems that often arise in family life. So this period is not easy for many couples.
2. Quarrels and conflicts
Naturally, any problems that you had before marriage, and your partner’s shortcomings that you discovered earlier, will not disappear anywhere, they will remain after the wedding. Therefore, the first year of marriage can be really tough because you may not have fully realized just how annoying your boyfriend or girlfriend’s behavior or habits can be.
Your first year can be full of conflict and quarrels. After all, quarrels and disagreements become much greater when two people begin to live together. But these fights will become less and less as you learn to accept your partner’s shortcomings and weaknesses, as well as begin to respect each other.
My husband and I, literally after half a year, learned to understand what upsets each of us, and agreed to avoid such things. Therefore, anyone should expect a lot of disagreement in the first year of marriage. But this is quite normal and natural. Don’t be afraid of it. It is better to work through all these points, find compromises, and it will make your relationship stronger.
3. Learning new things
No matter how well you thought you knew your partner before you got married, I guarantee that after you get married, you will discover many new things about him. Because marriage brings people closer together. As a result, you will learn a lot more about each other. For example, I learned that my husband does not like to eat alone. He also gets angry if he comes home from work and dinner isn’t ready at home. Although I work no less than he does.
Marriage is a whole new level in relationships. You will learn many new things about your partner. You will do a lot more together. And even if you’ve known your partner for many years, marriage will open your eyes to a few more quirks. In this case, your task is to accept them, and sincerely love your partner for who he is.
4. Additional costs and savings
When my husband and I met, I wanted to travel the world and be a free person. But when we got married, I had to give up those dreams – to a certain extent. I do not blame my husband for this. These are the realities of our time and family life. Instead, we turned our dreams into something positive and learned to find happiness elsewhere. We have a child, whom we both love and care for. We are also gradually starting to save money for our future big trip. Therefore, we have to save on some things.
The first year of marriage will keep you from some of the things you dream about. But it will create many more good moments that you never thought of. So learn to accept the good and don’t focus on the bad.
5. Additional responsibilities
In the first year of marriage, and in subsequent years as well, you will have more responsibilities and less free time in your life. This includes both household chores and the need to devote enough time to your partner and work on the relationship. You must communicate your feelings and desires to each other. There are some things you will need to discuss in the relationship that may not be said. Regular communication in a relationship should be one of the important points, you will need to spend a lot of time communicating with your partner and discussing your future life.
6. Keeping romance
In addition to adjusting to family life, your partner’s habits and routines, you will need to maintain romance in your relationship. At first, you will do the same things as at the very beginning of the relationship. You will laugh a lot, love each other, rejoice and enjoy life, but over time, life will change. You will grow up and it will be more and more difficult to maintain romance.
7. Preparing for the second year
Anyone who enters into family life should understand that marriage lasts no more than a year. And marriage lasts forever. The first year of marriage is a year of practice, but it can already show how ready you are for family life. After all, marriage is a long and difficult path with various mistakes and life lessons. Don’t be afraid to make mistakes. But do not forget to draw useful lessons from them. And even if your first year doesn’t go well, don’t be upset. There are many more years of married life ahead of you, which you can spend much more successfully than the beginning of your marriage.
Tips to Make Your First Year of Marriage More Successful
1. Communicate more and consult with each other
Remember that in family life, decisions must be made by both partners. So, again, don’t forget the importance of communication. Feel free to approach your partner, ask for advice, or ask for help. After all, marriage is just created in order to make people one whole. So that they live together in harmony and happiness.
2. Tactfulness and respect
Another important factor in building a successful alliance is mutual respect. Both partners should treat each other with respect. They must respect the wants and needs of their partner. Remember to practice good demeanor. Try not to hurt the other person’s feelings. Be tactful and kind with your partner, as a result it will be much easier for you to build a successful union.
3. Overcoming difficulties
As we said earlier, difficulties are inevitable in the first year of marriage, and they arise for every couple. And how you will relate to difficulties, and how you will cope with them, will largely depend on the success of the development of your relationship. You should discuss problems and misunderstandings with your partner. You do not need to close in yourself and accumulate problems. Solve them as they become available.
Maintain a positive outlook on life, and remember that after the night there always comes day. The same goes for life problems. And after the black stripe, there will definitely be a white stripe. And you will enjoy the fact that you did not give up, that together you overcome difficulties, and stay with your loved one.