How to fix bad relationships with your parents?
Good family relationships are important to each of us. But this is not so easy to achieve. After all, various misunderstandings and conflicts constantly arise between us. Because of which, bad relationships with parents are increasingly common. And it is becoming more and more difficult to achieve agreement in conflicts. Therefore, we have prepared some effective tips for you. So that you can improve your relationship with mom and dad.
Reasons for poor parenting
In most cases, this is due to a lack of normal communication. After all, every time we want to understand the problem that has arisen, everything develops into quarrels and conflicts. And this, of course, is not the type of communication that we want to establish with parents. Various verbal abuse directed at each other can gradually destroy understanding and love. Which must be present between parents and children. And scandals and curses only cause great harm to a person. And the memory of this may remain for life.
Bad relationships with parents can lead to mental disorders and stress. In this situation, we do not understand how we need to act. And we accept the fact that we will never have good ties with our parents. But in no case should we give up, and it is so easy to give up harmonious relationships with parents and a happy life. So how do you fix your bad relationship with your parents? Here are some strategies that come from my own experiences with mom and dad. I think it makes no sense to go into details and tell what problems I had with my parents. And it will be better if I just share my knowledge.
How to fix bad relationships with your parents
List the problems that arise between you
First, you should analyze what problems arise between you. It is very important. If you don’t know the real problems, then you are unlikely to be able to fix anything. So get to work. Make a list of recent conflicts you have with your parents and write down what triggered them. Write down what were said and words that particularly hurt the parents. In this case, there may be times when you feel that you are right about everything. And it will seem that you have no reason to say otherwise. You can stick to your points of view. However, take a sober look at the situation and put yourself in your parents’ shoes.
Formulate answers for each situation
Make a list of recent conflicts and try to form imaginary responses to each conflict situation. Then see which one is the best for solving the problem. This is important because when you have a fight, you speak without thinking. And often things that you later regret.
Therefore, imagine a conflict situation that is most likely between you and your parents. Then form the best answer you can give. And the next time you face a similar conflict situation, bring your answers to life. At the same time, try to remain calm in conflict and less emotional. Try to express yourself in a few sentences and refuse to get involved in fights.
Write them a letter
It will be good if you begin to resolve conflicts when your parents also calm down and behave with restraint. This will help you explain your point of view much more correctly. If they are not open to conversation and are still offended, then the best thing to do is write them a letter. Express your point of view in a respectful tone and say that you want to sort things out. Writing a letter is a good option. Because it excludes verbal interaction and you don’t show emotion. And verbal communication can also get out of hand. Lead to irritability and nervousness. The letter communicates your thoughts, not your hostility or anger. Which often appear during live communication. By expressing your thoughts in a letter, you avoid the opportunity to get out of control and say something unnecessary.
Quick Tips for Better Relationships with Parents
- Be patient and be prepared to hear from your parents.
- Don’t bring up past grudges if you want to solve a real problem.
- If you have a bad relationship with your parents. Then be open to communication and take the first step yourself. Don’t let your ego get in the way of better bonding with your parents.
- Be prepared to accept and admit your mistakes. Honestly admitting your own mistakes will be appreciated by your parents. And it can become a solid foundation on which a happy relationship will be built.
- To fix bad relationships with your parents, be absolutely honest about how you feel and what you expect from them. Don’t be afraid to talk about negative aspects that can make the situation worse. Tell your parents about this, only politely and without aggression. Make them want to reflect on their mistakes and feel the need to change their attitude towards you.
- Try to understand the situation from the point of view of the parents, and get them to see things from your side. Try to find common ground and be open to compromise. Don’t be too harsh, but stick to your position. Try to find compromises that are acceptable to everyone. If this is not possible, do as you see fit. Just try to explain to your parents why you did this.
- Say that you love them and, no matter what happens, you will support them and treat them with respect.
To summarize, try to communicate more with your parents, but do it calmly and with love. Keep them informed of what’s going on in your life. Take an interest in their health and offer your help. They will feel involved in your life, and will appreciate this attitude towards them. Respect them and speak politely (even if you don’t share their point of view). Keep in touch with them even if they are too busy. It is possible to take a few minutes during the day to call your parents and show them that they are a real part of your life.
Bad relationships with parents don’t happen overnight. So it cannot be fixed at the snap of your fingers. This is a tough job that takes time. Therefore, it is important that you continue to work on your relationship with your parents. Start with small steps, and constantly work to improve your relationship. And you will be surprised how the situation between you begins to change for the better.