There are different opinions, but in general, introverts in our society make up about 25 to 50 percent of the population. This means that at least one out of every four people around you is an introvert. Therefore, the question arises, how to make friends with an introvert and develop a close relationship with him? After learning how to communicate with such people, you will be able to establish more connections, and achieve greater success in life.
There is no doubt that many of us do not want to be introverts and try to do our best to become extroverts. Indeed, in all areas of our life, both personal and professional, communication with other people is the key to success. This can be seen even in the explosive growth of social networks. And by how much time people spend on their gadgets and on social networks.
Communication and maintaining harmonious relationships with other people play a huge role for us. This allows us to move up the career ladder faster. We can feel more comfortable in almost any social situation. These are all indicators that our norms and priorities are largely focused on communication and getting to know other people.
How not to befriend an introvert
If you are hoping to create and maintain a friendship with someone who seems withdrawn and uncommunicative. Then the usual ways to make friends in this case will not work. Here are a few things to avoid when you want to befriend an introvert.
1. Do not try to engage him / her in light friendly conversation.
What is easy and friendly conversation for you is an indescribably boring waste of time for most introverts. Talking about the weather, your life problems, or the latest news will only alienate this person. Shy people, as a rule, do not like to tell a stranger some details of their personal life. Accordingly, they will not be too interested in hearing similar stories from you.
2. Don’t invite an introvert to a big party.
At the very least, don’t do this until you get to know him or her well enough. Most likely, the person will decline your invitation. Which will make you feel rejected. Plus, making friends with an introvert will be much more difficult after that. Therefore, at first try to meet with him in uncrowded places. Where you both feel comfortable.
3. Don’t use your phone as your primary mode of communication
Most introverts have a pretty distinct disdain for phones. In addition, many people simply do not like the annoying smartphone ringing that constantly breaks into our lives. If it is difficult for a person to communicate in real life, then talking on the phone will be also difficult for him. In any case, he needs to think a little before saying anything. And silence on the phone for introverts is a common thing.
4. Don’t try to befriend every introvert.
Most extroverts develop extensive social networks. They even get to know random people. And they often try to include introverts in their network. However, most shy people are not very keen on maintaining such a vast web of superficial relationships. They actually find it drains them and distracts them from socializing with loved ones and friends. Therefore, begin to be friends with an introvert only when you see a mutual response from his side. And when you realize that you find him a really interesting person with whom you can talk about interesting things. Not because you just want to add another face to your “friend collection”.
However, don’t assume that the introvert doesn’t care about other people’s feelings and doesn’t want to be friends with you. Many introverts crave communication that is difficult for them to find in our extroverted society. And if you can find the right approach to an introvert and communicate with him in a way that matters to him, then you can truly become a loyal and devoted friend to him.
How to make friends with an introvert
Show a genuine interest in the person you are trying to befriend. Begin communication and acquaintance with a person only if he really interested you in something. Introverts are interested in discussing topics they are passionate about. Remember this.
1. Use email and other online communication tools
If you want to make friends with an introvert, then you should know that most of them adore social networks and communication on the network. This is where they feel absolutely comfortable. Because they can give well thought out and clearly formulated answers at their usual pace. They can do this at any time and when it suits them. Although not all introverts are involved in instant messaging. But I know that most of them prefer this kind of communication, especially at the initial stage of acquaintance.
2. The first time meet with him one-on-one
Invite him / her for coffee, a walk in the park, or any other place that involves small group interaction. Better yet, if you are all alone. Most of all, people who do not like society like quiet and peaceful places. They love nature, bird watching, cycling, or watching movies. An introvert who is given the opportunity to communicate with you without interruption and interruption can surprise you with his talkativeness and sincere interest in your life. Just remember that introverts are selective about who they communicate with. Therefore, if a man or woman is an introvert decided to talk to you. She is probably fascinated by some aspect of your personality.
3. Take short breaks from communication.
Why should every second of your communication with a person be filled with noise and unnecessary words? There is nothing wrong with being silent during a conversation. While this is usually considered an awkward moment, it’s different with introverts. Think of silence as a good time to reflect on what you talked about and what might be helpful to say next.
Remember, introverts love silence and loneliness. Therefore, do not overload them with the intensity of communication, especially at the beginning of your acquaintance and friendship. Although, if you are an extrovert, it can be difficult for you to do this. But introverts should be treated with respect if you really want to develop a friendship with them.
4. Meet in places that he / she is familiar with
If you are inviting a person to a meeting or a party, make sure that he knows the place, or knows at least some people. In the event that you find yourself with an introvert at a meeting where he does not know anyone. Then introduce him to your acquaintances, and involve him in communication, or in some kind of interaction. This can include a variety of games. For example: board, card, video games, or any other entertainment. But only those that do not require continuous conversations.
5. Ask for help
Making friends with an introvert isn’t really difficult. In addition, many of them are good helpers and true friends. Therefore, they will be happy to do something meaningful for you, and will be happy to help you set up, clean, prepare food or go to the store.
6. Engage the introvert in your class.
The opportunity to be just an observer, or to be involved in some activity, is to the liking of many introverts. This can be a movie watching, a television sports game, or a fun competition. When a shy person becomes busy, he thinks less about his isolation and shyness.
If you are an extrovert, you may find it difficult to communicate with an introvert. However, it can also be a rewarding experience for you. You will be able to get to know other people better and expand your circle of acquaintances. After all, there are so many brilliant, creative and talented individuals who hide behind their “introverted walls.” Therefore, learn to communicate with all people, and have fun expanding your horizons and making new friends.