I want to cheat on my husband – why not or maybe it is worth doing it?
According to statistics, the fair sex wants to “give horns” to their chosen one no less than men. You also had such a thought in your head, because your spouse stopped paying attention and giving compliments, tenderness disappeared, and you can not talk about intimacy at all?
Top reasons to change in women
Here are the main reasons why a wife wants to cheat on her husband:
- Desire for revenge. Usually, women react in this way to the news of the infidelity of the faithful. The deceived spouses want to repay their partner with the same coin. However, there is no need to rush.
- Lack of sex life. Constant fatigue of a loved one, refusal to fulfill “marital duty” provoke anger at him and self-doubt.
- Bad habits and behavior. Abusive and disrespectful behavior, lack of compliments and interest from the spouse can push the wife into the strong arms of another man.
- Unjustified expectations. Each married couple has its own individual characteristics, but in any family there is a routine, everyday problems, quarrels and scandals occur. When there is no understanding between two people or expectations do not correspond to reality, thoughts of cheating may arise.
- Love has faded away. This is the most serious and most justifiable reason. When spouses have been together for a long time, have a common business, children and many other connecting factors, it is stability and constancy that can get bored. A woman perceives her life partner as a friend and respected person, but not a beloved man.
Should you cheat on your husband if he betrayed?
Before cheating on your chosen one, psychologists recommend giving answers to several questions:
- Why do you want to change? For the faithful to feel the same that you experienced? In this case, the desire for revenge is a bad advisor.
- What will be the consequences of your infidelity? Believe me, you will not be satisfied, on the contrary, you will feel even worse.
- Will you blame yourself after what happened? It is possible that the spouse will sincerely repent and want to start everything from scratch, and you will only ruin everything by betrayal.
- What do you want: physical sensations or something more? If you want a serious relationship, then hasty intimacy will only ruin everything, you will feel used up.
- Do you feel that your husband is not your other half? First of all, you need to understand whether your spouse is really your man.
How to get rid of the desire to change
Analyze your relationship with your spouse. How did they differ from those when you looked at your faithful with loving eyes and even in your thoughts could not allow treason on your part? Take a piece of paper, divide it in half, and write briefly “before” on one half and “after” on the other. Find the differences.
Once your faithful said or did something that hurt you. And you saw it as a betrayal on his part. If you do not immediately deal with the situation and your feelings, then the level of trust decreases, openly speaking about your emotions becomes problematic, and sometimes even unbearable.
This provokes a chill in the relationship. They cease to be deep and sincere, although in appearance they may seem beautiful. Such cracks between spouses turn into a deep abyss over time.
Remember all your grudges against your partner that makes you angry and have a heart-to-heart talk with him. But before doing this, write a letter in which you list the unpleasant situations that have offended. Describe what hopes and dreams he has buried with his attitude, tell us how you feel betrayed.
You should write until you have the desire to say words of love and gratitude to him. If there is too much resentment and pain, see a psychologist. And only when the pain subsides, talk about it with your husband.
Why shouldn’t you do this before the pain is gone? Because you will not be able to talk about your feelings, but will only blame the chosen one. Talk about exactly what actions offended you, because he might not even know about it. In a fit of anger, you will not be able to express yourself clearly, and after all, honesty and sincerity are so important in a relationship. By freeing yourself from resentment, you can restore the level of trust and get rid of the urge to go “left”.
If, after writing a letter and having a direct conversation, you realize that you are strangers, honestly tell about it. After all, living with an unloved person and dreaming about another is real violence towards oneself.
What can be the consequences of female infidelity
There are a lot of options here, and the most typical ones are divorce, indifference or reconciliation. If your spouse decides to end the marriage, prepare yourself for a morally and financially independent life. If the chosen one provided you, then now you will have to deny yourself in many ways.
A minute’s weakness can ruin many years of family life. It is quite possible that this is exactly your case. Are you ready to cross out the past in a stroke and plunge into a new relationship? Will you be able to forgive yourself for such an act or will you suffer and suffer?
In addition, when you think about cheating, think that your parents and friends can find out about adultery, and then in their eyes it will be you who will be to blame for the breakup of the family.
There is another option – the lover is unlikely to want to enter into a serious relationship and connect his life with a woman who is capable of betraying a loved one.