Going to a meeting, a guy does not always count on sex. If the girl is not ready for him, then the refusal is accepted with respect. If you agree, the guy doesn’t mind either. Moreover, his self-esteem, confidence in attractiveness and irresistibility rises. Attitudes towards girls who have had sexual intercourse are different among men. Some consider them readily available. Others, who, according to the materials of opinion polls, more than 70%, explain this act by the impossibility of refusal to such sexy, charming guys.
There are women who think that, having shown themselves to be a skillful lover, a man cannot refuse them. In this case, I want to give advice, distinguish feelings from sex. They are not the same thing.
It happens that girls enter into an intimate relationship on the first day of their acquaintance under pressure from a guy, for fear of being abandoned. This is silly. If a man is interested in a woman, he will wait.
True, as life shows, not for long. Modern guys have lost the hunting instinct as unnecessary. There is a possibility that if she refuses physical intimacy for several dates, the girl herself brings the end of the relationship closer, since not every man is ready to wait for the main prize for a long time.
Most women adhere to the regulations established by fashionable women’s magazines, which inform that it is permissible to have sex on 4-5 dates.
In reality, the outcome of sex with a girl on a first date is unpredictable. An intimate relationship remains one-off or develops into a long-term relationship. It’s like a game of roulette, where everyone loses or wins the main prize at any moment.
Pros and cons of being intimate on a first date
Consider the real dangers that lie in wait during one-time sex:
- infection with sexually transmitted diseases;
- partner’s sadistic and manic tendencies;
- depriving the girl of further courtship;
- your partner’s addiction to those types of sex that are unacceptable to you;
- the ability to get pregnant if you refuse to use or lack contraceptives;
- frustration, decreased self-esteem on the part of the girl;
- the inability to continue the relationship.
There are also positive aspects of sex on a first date:
- the uselessness of pretense, portraying a shy woman;
- full surrender of the gripped passion;
- novelty of impressions and, as a result, bright sex.
Psychologists recommend weighing and assessing the risks of sex on the first date, making the right decision.
If a woman takes the first sex as the beginning of a long-term relationship, then men at this stage achieve their goal and consider further courtship inappropriate. You must be an extraordinary person and a good lover in order to keep the attention of a member of the opposite sex for a long time.
Strong mutual desire
Sex is possible in the case of mutual desire. If the guy insists, and the girl is against, you should not agree. Entering into coitus for the sake of keeping a man near itself does not justify the hopes. As practice shows, such a relationship is short-lived, since interest quickly fades away and there are no feelings.
Distinguish between sex and love
If the girl agreed to have sex on the first date, then she should understand that this is the place where the romance will most likely end. One-day relationships will not replace full-fledged relationships, they will not bring marital happiness.
How to behave on a first date
Tips for women
1. Look impressive.
Men love with their eyes. On the first date, on which your future may depend, present yourself in a favorable light. Guys love grooming, appreciate naturalness. They like clean, beautifully styled hair, neat manicure, seductive scent and feminine, figure-flattering clothing.
2. Avoid unpleasant topics in conversation.
Chat on neutral topics. There is no need to burden the guy with your problems, all the more to complain about the former gentleman. Discuss weather, sports and cultural events. Give your opinion on the novel you read or the movie you watched.
Eliminate active gestures, speak articulately and confidently, do not allow hysterical cries and shrill notes.
3. Learn to listen and praise.
The ability to listen without interrupting the interlocutor is not common among girls. Be tact and understanding. Men, like the weaker sex, love praise. Give a couple of subtle compliments about masculinity and charm, the guy will be flattered.
4. Do not play roles that are unusual for you.
Be yourself. Imperiousness, posturing scares guys away. Wanting to attract a man, girls behave unnaturally, which reduces the chances of further relationships. But this does not mean that you need to fully open up. Use the understatement, keep the intrigue to the end.
5. How to make an “obscene” offer.
Usually you don’t have to offer sex to a girl. After observing her behavior, a man draws certain conclusions, takes the initiative. Playful looks, flirting, half-hints do their job. As a last resort, invite your boyfriend for tea or coffee after he walked you home.
6. Create yourself a comfortable environment.
From a security point of view, it is better if the first physical intimacy occurs in your apartment. It is easier to relax on your territory, there is no reason to worry that someone will disturb you or your gentleman will behave inappropriately. An option with a pre-booked hotel room is allowed.
7. Protect yourself.
If a guy with unprotected sex with a stranger runs the risk of contracting sexually transmitted diseases, then the girl, in addition, may still become pregnant. Do not under any pretext agree to have sex without a condom. One night, even of passionate love pleasures, is incommensurate with the price of carelessness.
A man will appreciate your upbringing, good manners, beautiful posture. Feelings of dignity and self-esteem are involuntarily transmitted to the partner. Be prepared for the first and last night together.
Tips for men
A guy, unlike a girl, is almost always ready for sex, no matter how well he knows his partner. A few tips for men on how to bring a partner to physical intimacy on a first date:
1. Find a suitable place.
The back rows of the cinema, a skating rink, going out into the countryside for a barbecue will be appropriate for tactile touches. If this is a cafe, then give preference to an institution where a decent audience gathers. It’s good if the saxophone sounds, its sounds awaken sexuality.
Choose a location near your home. Before a date, under the pretext that you forgot something, invite the girl to come to your apartment for a minute. If she agrees and gets acquainted with the situation in advance, then returning here again will not be so scary.
2. Choose a girl from your environment.
If you are determined to have sex on the first date, then invite a girl from your circle of acquaintances or with whom you work together, study. It is psychologically easier for a woman to agree to sex, even with an acquaintance in absentia, than with an absolutely stranger. It’s about trust.
3. Show your leadership skills.
As you know, girls are indifferent to obedient boys. They are interested in brutal guys who know what they want, confidently going towards the goal. A woman who feels a real man next to her, with whom she is comfortable and not bored, is more likely to agree to sex at the first romantic meeting.
4. Take care of external attractiveness and more.
If you are in a dirty, wrinkled shirt, have not shaved for a long time, you smell bad, then only a woman of the same kind will agree to have sex with you. You should be pleasing to the eye, smell like a good perfume.
Get condoms in advance, as without them sex with a stranger is taboo. Prepare the apartment for the reception of the guest. Pay special attention to the bedroom, clean up, make fresh bedding, make sure you have a night light.
5. Flirt and seduce.
Look the girl straight in the eye with a playful look. Show off your humor. It is not for nothing that the people say that if a man made a woman laugh, then it means that he conquered.
A guy’s sexiest organ is his mind. Enchant the girl with intelligence, be an interesting storyteller. Self-irony is welcome.
If the girl talks about herself, listen silently and patiently. This behavior will be perceived as a sincere interest in her personality, after which she will begin to trust you more.
6. Don’t forget about tactile touch.
Wait for the moment when the girl’s tightness disappears, she will join your game. As if by chance, place your hand on her shoulders or waist, sit close enough to press your foot against her leg. No ostentatious slaps on the buttocks or pinches on the chest, this will ruin everything.
Don’t put off the kiss until the last moment. In order for a girl to agree to sex, it is not enough to show a sharp mind, she needs to be aroused at the physiological level.
7. Do not talk about intentions until the very end.
Don’t bother discussing what you will do later in your home. The girl doubts to the last whether to agree to the continuation of the evening and whether it is worth trusting you. This should happen as if by accident. Find a suitable excuse to “continue the banquet” in your apartment.
How to maintain a relationship after having sex on a first date
The outcome of first sex after a first date varies. Relationships end before they start for many reasons. And they do not always lie in the behavior of a woman. The man is ashamed of his failure in bed, he turned out to be married or a convinced bachelor. Not hooked, no feelings, but you never know reasons to disappear forever.
If you are in awe of a night together and want to meet again, then avoid the following mistakes:
- talk about living together;
- bestow caresses beyond measure and show excessive deliberate care;
- think of him as a potential husband;
- call and suggest a new meeting.