Did you meet a handsome young man, went on a date and liked him? And when they came home, there was a strong desire to see him again, and now you do not know whether to write to the guy first? You might think that if the man hasn’t written himself yet, then the message from you may seem too desperate. But this is just a delusion.
Perhaps you have already started looking for information on social networks or asking friends if you should write to the guy first. Just don’t worry so much, your message to a young man can have many benefits. Here are eight main reasons to take the first step.
Reasons to take the first step
1. You are honest about your feelings and desires.
It’s perfectly okay to write to a guy like, “I wanted to say I had a good time today and I hope we’ll see you again.” He can feel the same, and if he is a cultured person, he will definitely answer. You do not need to be afraid to be open and honest at the beginning of a relationship, it will only benefit. From how you begin to develop feelings at the very beginning, will set the tone for the further development of your love.
2. You show your sincerity
This will show that you are not like most girls. Don’t be afraid to express your feelings and emotions. Sincerity is really attractive and appealing to the opposite sex. Nowadays it is not easy to find such a person, your boyfriend will be definitely impressed.
3. It is difficult to recognize hints on a date.
We find it difficult to recognize clues from other people. Perhaps during a date, the guy hinted more than once that he wants to continue the relationship and communicate with you, but you just did not catch these moments. And he thought that you didn’t like it and didn’t know what to do next. The first step on your part will help solve this problem.
4. He is waiting for you to write
I agree that a guy should be the first to take the initiative. After all, girls want a strong and confident person near them. However, not all men think so. Everyone can have their own beliefs and principles. Perhaps he is too shy or he has had a negative experience in the past and is now feeling insecure about the development of the relationship.
5. You can’t sit and wait
If you find a confident guy who doesn’t have social fears, that’s great. But if you like a shy guy, then you have to take the first step. There is no need to wait for everything to happen by itself, and then complain that the relationship is not developing in any way.
6. You will get what you want faster
Life is short and the years go by very quickly. Be the first to act and take the initiative. Instead of sitting and waiting, just write to him and your relationship will already move to a new stage.
7. Interest has its own duration.
If there is no manifestation of sympathy, then the romantic interest in a person will begin to cool down. Don’t put off starting a relationship until later. If you avoid correspondence for a long time, it will lead to a loss of interest from some side. And you will begin to doubt the advisability of developing a relationship with this person. Don’t put off until tomorrow what you can do today.
8. Your initiative will only strengthen his feelings.
In fact, many men love it when girls write to them. They understand that you are interested in them and will take matters into their own hands. Just do not need to write too many messages, and if the guy did not answer, then constantly send him question marks. Also, if you are “lucky” to meet a shy guy, it will help him to loosen up a little and feel more confident.
How to write a guy first
- Don’t just write “Hello”, it’s not a good way to start dialogue. Ask him a question. For example, how he got home or what he is doing;
- Throw off your joint photo, if any, or a snapshot of the places where you walked together;
- Do not write too many messages in a row, let him answer the first one. Perhaps he is busy, and when he is free and sees a large number of unanswered messages, this will not surprise him much;
- Tell us about your hobbies, what other places you like to visit. This will help him find ideas for future meetings;
- Don’t use too many emojis. This may seem cute in some cases, but be careful and use them wisely;
- Write correctly and avoid abbreviations;
- Keep your thoughts clear and concise. You don’t need to write too long texts.
When you shouldn’t write first
- When you drank. In this state, it can be very tempting to text a guy, but you shouldn’t;
- When you have nothing to say. Don’t just send him emoticons. This will not contribute to the development of a normal dialogue;
- If the date is just over. While it may be helpful to thank him for a pleasant evening, just wait a bit, maybe he will write himself.
- If you are in a bad mood. Perhaps you have had a hard day or are upset about something, at this moment the best solution would be to rest;
- If you know he is with friends now. No need to be jealous or too intrusive;
- If you know he is busy right now.
What is waiting game and why is it a bad idea
If you’re not sure if you should write your boyfriend first, you can find many articles that encourage passive women. They say that you need to wait a few days for the guy to take the first step. Just the fact that he hasn’t written to you for several hours does not mean that you need to suppress the desire to write to him. The “waiting game” will not lead to a positive outcome. We have become a society of people who are too afraid to show interest in other people and express their feelings.
At these moments, the girls think, “I really like him, but I don’t want to be the first to show it. I will then look too desperate and approachable, he will not respect me. I’d rather wait for him to write first. ” The guy in turn thinks, “She’s an interesting girl, and I really got her attention, but I don’t want to seem like one of those guys who don’t have a girlfriend. I’ll wait a little longer and see her behavior. ”
This is how two people who liked each other hide their real feelings. Instead of being sincere and honest. Why do people have an urgent need to hide it? The answer lies in our ego. The person will use any excuse to protect their ego and appear important. In addition, we are afraid that we will be denied and our self-esteem will drop even more. We have become too passive and wait for someone to make a decision for us and do everything.
All you need now is not to bother with questions: should you write to the guy first, or maybe I’d rather wait for him to write. Take the first step, it’s not as scary as you think!