I think many women will be interested to know what are the signs of a narcissist in a man in a relationship, and how they can be identified in advance. After all, the very last type of guy to meet and start a relationship with is the narcissist. But recognizing this type can be really tricky.
The term narcissism was coined in honor of Narcissus, a character in Greek mythology who fell in love with his own reflection in the pool. For the most part, this is a selfish, vain and narcissistic person. Although, if you think about it, isn’t each of us a little selfish? However, many have moral limits and principles of life that we do not cross. A normal person can sometimes cheat in order to look decent, unlike a narcissist who knows no boundaries in this. For him, his own self-esteem is above all.
Why does a person become narcissistic?
There are several key factors that lead to excessive self-love. Many of them stem from unhealthy relationships with parents, or when children are abandoned in early childhood. It can also be due to over-praise for their looks or talents as a child. Even if these talents are valid, the increased attention causes a distortion of reality.
In many cases, parents do not properly shape the child’s personality, which causes him to become a narcissist, which in turn leads to an inability to form attachments or long-term relationships with other people. Such a person will have many unsuccessful relationships in the future. He often underestimates and does not respect people. He prefers to change partners and look for people with a higher value. I do not recommend building serious relationships with such people. And to avoid a relationship with a narcissist, you should look for the following traits in people.
The main signs of a narcissist in a man in a relationship
1. During the conversation, he is focused only on himself
If a person is focused only on himself when talking to people, then this is disrespectful behavior and a warning sign. Another example is that the person does not listen to what you say, but only waits for the moment when you stop to start talking.
Yes, we all do that sometimes. But in the narcissist, this is very common. When he listens, you can expect him to interrupt you and start talking at any time. Basically, he didn’t really even listen to you, but was just looking for a moment to start talking about himself.
2. He prefers to be friends only with successful people
The narcissist is attracted to successful people and values them above all else. But the one who is absorbed in success, who thinks only about money and about his own benefits, is an egoist. It is very difficult to build successful romantic relationships with such people. Because all their thoughts and time are aimed only at achieving goals.
3. He cannot maintain long-term relationships with other people.
This person will not have permanent or real friends. So if your boyfriend doesn’t get along with other people, this is a warning sign to look out for. And if a man is overly anxious to be in the spotlight at the expense of his friends, then it is better not to deal with him at all.
4. He has no empathy for other people.
Narcissists find it difficult to recognize the needs of others due to their own self-centeredness. He usually retains a haughty character. He does not want to reckon with the work of other people, and constantly exaggerates his participation in any business. The narcissist always considers himself the most valuable person, and does not respect others.
5. Excessive attention to your appearance
If a man spends a lot of time in front of a mirror, pays too much attention to his appearance, likes to visit beauty salons – these are obvious signs of a man’s narcissist in a relationship. After all, a person who is overly concerned about his appearance, as a rule, loves and values only himself. He considers himself unique or special, and other people as ordinary.
Also, social media, in particular Instagram, is a great place for narcissists. Therefore, be careful if you see in his profile a lot of photos of only one of him, and not group photos with other people. Normal people have both. But a person who constantly uploads a photo with the appeal “Look how beautiful I am” is a potential narcissist.
6. The desire to use other people for their own purposes
One of the worst traits of narcissism is the desire to always use other people without considering their feelings or consequences. Narcissists prefer to make friends for a specific purpose only. And once they get what they want, then they no longer have a reason to continue the friendship. The same can happen in romantic relationships.
7. Unwillingness to listen to healthy criticism
An obvious trait of a narcissist is the inability to deal with any criticism or calmly settle differences. Narcissists are used to being praised all the time. Therefore, they are highly sensitive to everything negative. So, if the slightest criticism from your side leads him to an emotional explosion, or he does not want to listen to your opinion, then this is another sign of a narcissistic man in a relationship.
What if you are already in a relationship with a narcissist?
If you are already in a relationship with a narcissist, there are a few things you need to understand. First, he will always love himself more than he loves you. You will have to get used to his bad habits or bad behavior towards you. A narcissist can lie a lot and behave dishonestly. You must remember that the narcissist will defend his opinion, regardless of the truth and how it affects others.
Promises on his part are usually meaningless. He may be constantly late and not appreciate your time. So, if your partner makes excuses to leave on business, even though you agreed to spend this evening together, then it is likely that you are in a relationship with a narcissistic man.
And if your relationship with such a guy is over, then do not expect sympathy. What you can expect is a complete inattention to your feelings. Depending on where you are in your life together, you can also count on empty bank accounts or credit card debt.
I hope you are reading this before getting into a serious relationship with a narcissist. Therefore, pay close attention to the signs of a narcissistic man in the relationship that I voiced above. And if it’s too late, and you understand that this is exactly the person next to you, then it is best to break off relations with him before it is too late. Because every minute of an unhealthy relationship just prevents you from being happy as a person.
You should also never feel guilty about what happened. You should be glad that you have realized what kind of person this is. So don’t look for answers, and don’t blame yourself. Be happy that you can be free again, and you will definitely find new love.