In family relationships, everything can be – tears, screams, laughter, joy, as they say, in sorrow and in joy until the end of days. But what to do when there are more negative emotions, and constant quarrels destroy the marriage bond. Reasons for quarrels Yes, there is no family quarrel without quarrels, but the nature of such relationships can be different – small trifles, serious contradictions. Misunderstanding can arise in any area – raising children, material wealth, sexual relations, jealousy, interference from friends, parents, and so on.
How to avoid frequent family quarrels?
It is completely impossible to avoid quarrels and conflicts. But you can take steps to reduce them, making your life much happier.
You don’t need to change your partner’s character
Sometimes the spouse’s weaknesses and shortcomings begin to irritate. And people are trying to change a person. Failed attempts stress and make life unbearable for both spouses. After all, what you don’t like about a person can be a highlight for other people. It is worth remembering that at the beginning of the relationship, this habit or character trait was quite acceptable.
Do not stir up the past
Should not worry about the past life of the spouse. Everything that came before was before you. Every person has a past. People cannot change it. Why delve into and pull out memories from oblivion that can ruin life in the present.
Do not listen to the opinions of outsiders
Attempts by friends and relatives to “open their eyes” to a spouse, not always out of good intentions. Listening to the opinion of “well-wishers”, over time, you can doubt your correctness. Don’t discuss your partner with anyone. Don’t let them talk about him in a negative tone. You can’t tell your loved ones about the spat.
Control what is said in anger
Especially women, in a fit of anger, can say such things that they themselves remain terrified. It is very difficult to explain later that what has been said has nothing to do with reality. “The word is not a sparrow …” and the spouse will remember the offensive, unfair words for a long time. Humiliation of manhood can be especially fatal. And if this is repeated often, it leads to a complete rupture of relations.
Do not cover up problems
Frequent clarifications of relationships and controversial issues exhaust the spouses. Sometimes one of them, tired of quarrels, tacitly agrees with his half. Latent resentment and feelings of injustice accumulate in the soul, demanding an exit, causing stress and illness. And at one suitable moment, a grandiose scandal happens when all the accumulated negative falls out on the spouse’s head. Often such scandals end in divorce.
Trust your partner
Jealousy can make family life unbearable. Constant control, surveillance, eavesdropping on conversations – humiliate a person. Life at gunpoint, the need for excuses, cannot last long. It is impossible to protect yourself from betrayal of your partner in this way, and it is not worth it.
Admit your mistakes
Even if you have done something rash and wrong, it is better to admit it in time. Asking for forgiveness and trying to fix the situation is a surefire way to improve relationships and avoid conflict.
Look at the problem with partner gases
Even if you are completely confident in your righteousness, you should try to evaluate the problem from your partner. Sometimes this method produces amazing results. It turns out that this situation is also your fault.
Signs of an imminent breakup
If constant quarrels in the family reach the point of insults and physical influences, you need to think about divorce. The constant stress in which a person lives in such a family will certainly affect his psychological and physical health. Insomnia and depression appear, working capacity and quality of life decrease. Divorce as the only way out of a difficult situation.
I put my shoes in the wrong place, washed the dishes in the wrong way, looked askance, etc. – sometimes clinging to trifles becomes constant. Failure to comply with a whim causes aggression and irritation. This behavior indicates that love and respect are no longer there.
After frequent routine squabbles, there is no desire for a quick reconciliation. The fear of losing a loved one disappears. Constant conflict kills love.
Thoughts about the upcoming temporary separation cause joy.
Living together is not complete without clarifying the relationship. And the departure of the spouse to work, on a business trip, to a meeting with friends is expected with impatience. The thought of an imminent meeting spoils the mood. I don’t want to write SMS, call and talk about how boring the world is in separation. If the spouses feel great when separated, it is better to separate.
Although there are plenty of claims and reasons for quarrels, I no longer want to sort things out. There is a desire to be alone. Increasingly, interior doors remain closed. There is no longer a need to share the details of the day with your partner. The question “How are you?” becomes rhetorical and does not require a detailed answer. There is no desire to help and support in difficult times. It becomes impossible to make a sacrifice for the sake of a loved one. Why live together if you have become strangers?
One partner always goes to reconciliation
Quarrels have become frequent, and one always goes first to contact and reconciliation. He will soon get tired of this circumstance and then a break in relations is inevitable. And if both spouses show their pride, it will happen much faster.
Desire to subjugate a partner
Most often in a family, it is men who have a desire to subjugate their wife. During family squabbles, he tries to insult and intimidate a woman. He likes it when she is in his power. This behavior cannot last long. This is exactly the case when you have to leave without hesitation.
Disrespect and contempt
Contempt is often the cause of strife. It doesn’t matter what caused it: a collapsed business, failures at work, or an overweight figure. Feeling condemnation in the eyes of a spouse, coldness and detachment appear in response. The spouses cannot continue their life together.