Many of us have found ourselves in a situation where the date has failed, and we did not know how to continue to behave, and what to do. This can happen to every person, and for various reasons that we could not think of. After all, we go on a date with promising hopes that it will be successful, and we will continue the relationship with the person.
But quite often, factors beyond our control can change everything. For example, the meeting was unsuccessful due to our fault, or you chose the wrong place for a date. Or they started a conversation on a topic that turned out to be unacceptable to a person. But whatever the reason, don’t be upset. We have prepared some useful tips for you on what you can do now so that the person will give you another chance.
1. Think What Went Wrong
If your date has failed, then the first thing to do is work out the mistakes and understand the true reason for the failure. Think what went wrong? Remember what you talked about, and what exactly did the person dislike? If you are not sure where the mistake was actually made, then ask your partner. Just before that, be sure to apologize. And tell them that you will not do such things in the future.
2. Start with an apology
Forget pride and tell the person the following: “I know you didn’t expect to hear or see this. So I want to apologize. I understand that I offended you, but I really like you very much, and I would like to meet again and correct my mistake. ” Just keep your apology short, literally a few sentences. Because no one likes to hear or read a mountain of apologies and smell despair.
3. Discuss the situation that happened
If your date ended unsuccessfully and was rather unpleasant. Then all your subsequent messages will be a little awkward and funny. Therefore, you do not need to get too serious and pretend to be a confident person. Don’t be afraid to sound funny and light up the situation. Calmly talk about what happened between you. This is a good way to release tension and also to show that you are not taking yourself too seriously.
4. Be honest and sincere
Say that you were very nervous because you were waiting for this date, which is why this awkward moment happened. Nerves have ruined many meetings and dates, but this does not mean that you should be ashamed of yourself. At the same time, you don’t need to hide your nervousness. In fact, being honest about a failed date is the best thing to do. If you tell your partner how nervous you are, then at least he won’t have to wonder why you behaved this way. Plus, having a sincere conversation about what happened will calm you down a little.
5. Don’t talk about love or compatibility
On a first date, it can be very difficult to know if you have mutual feelings or not. It doesn’t matter if your date failed or was successful. So it’s better to just apologize and explain why you did it and ask for a second chance. There is no need to say that you fell in love with a person, and now you cannot live without him. As we said earlier, be honest and don’t be pitying. This will give you a better chance of accepting the apology and seeing the person again.
6. No need to brag and praise yourself
There is no need to explain to the person why he should excuse you and give you another chance. In no case should you praise yourself. Needless to say, you are a successful banker, a famous person, you earn a lot, and so on. This will only worsen the situation you are in. Instead, it’s better to admit your mistake and explain why you did it or said something inappropriate. Also promise that in the future this will not happen again and you will behave very differently.
7. Don’t send a text wall of messages
Don’t overwhelm the person with long messages explaining why your date failed or why you deserve a second chance. Show that you value his / her time instead. Write a short and polite message. In which you apologize for the situation that happened and ask for the right to have another date.
8. Suggest a different type of date
Say that the second date will be different. And you will not make such mistakes. If you went to a restaurant or cafe on your first date, then try something different next time. Watch interesting events or shows taking place in your city, and invite your partner to one of them. Just don’t be afraid that this date might fail. After all, you have already learned from past mistakes. So this time everything will go well.
Basic rules to follow on a date
- You don’t need to talk a lot about yourself. It will be much better if you listen to your partner and ask him questions, and not only talk about your life.
- Watch your words and what you say.
- Do not get carried away by questions about a person’s work and financial situation. This will set a bad tone for your conversation. Many people don’t like talking about how much they make or why they don’t like their job.
- Don’t talk about relationships at all. Not about the past, not about the present and about the future. This is a forbidden first date topic.
- No need to be smart. Although each of us on first dates wants to show our best side. But do not start conversations on too clever topics. You will look boring and uninteresting to your partner. In addition, it is unlikely that he / she will want to meet with you next time.
- Don’t complain or criticize yourself. There is no need to talk about your shortcomings. You can fully open up to the person, but only when several meetings take place and you get to know each other better.