Why does passion pass between spouses in marriage? Why is your intimate life fading into the background, and you love each other less and less? After all, when you just started to build relationships, or your family life, you loved each other very much. You wanted to spend all your free time together. And, if you were not together, you talked on the phone or wrote each other emails and messages. But now everything has changed.
Couples who believe that the feelings they had on their wedding day should be the same throughout their marriage tend to fail. Research shows that many of these marriages end within the first three years. Starting on the day of the wedding, the feeling that every person in the relationship is unable to maintain passion leads to arguments, stress, and, in fact, to rejection in all areas of family life, which ultimately leads to divorce. Below are some more reasons why people kill love in their relationships, and how you can fix it.
Usually, this is the very first problem that arises between a husband and wife. In this case, a woman after marriage does not understand who to listen to, her husband or mother. She cares more about her mom and doesn’t want to hurt her feelings, even if it means standing up for her husband. And it can be very painful for her because her husband doesn’t love her mom as much as she does.
Her husband loves his mother, and it seems to him that something is wrong with his wife if they don’t get along. Why couldn’t his wife be more intelligent, patient and understanding? In truth, this is a struggle between parent and child. Because they must learn to break this bond when a mother allows her child (husband or wife) to become adults.
In order for your relationship to continue to thrive, you need to learn how to protect your partner. You must not allow your spouse to be disrespectful. Now you are as one, and your mother should also understand this.
Before we get married, we get used to spending. However, when you get married or get married, you start sharing your money. Of course, some couples keep separate bank accounts, but in most cases, couples have a shared budget. And, if someone alone does not know how to reasonably manage money, then as a result disputes and conflict situations arise.
Money should be one of the first topics for discussion. You should budget together for the month. For example, my husband and I agree that small and rare purchases (under $ 20) do not require discussion, but we will definitely negotiate larger purchases. We always know how much money we have in our account and how much we can spend.
Like everything else in your marriage, money will always be a topic of compromise and communication. So work together to keep both of you happy.
3. Questions of hygiene and appearance
What causes passion in marriage? Of course, due to changes in your appearance. When you first get married or get married, you want to look good for your partner. You want to stay in shape, watch yourself, play sports, and so on. But then, when one of you starts to work harder and harder, the result is to return home later. And the reasons and the desire to look and dress well gradually disappear. You take a shower only in the morning before work, and after work just go to bed.
As you get more comfortable with your married spouse, your weight, your wardrobe, and your hygiene are not the only things you turn a blind eye to. Soon you will stop closing the bathroom door. You start to leave dirty socks and things in all rooms.
But this way of life, your unclean hair and, perhaps, even your not very pleasant breath, complicate your intimate life. Remember, hygiene and good looks are important in a marriage.
4. Weight gain
After some time in marriage, many men and women begin to gain weight. They are less and less mindful of themselves and their weight. They believe that they have already found their soul mate, and will love each other until the end of their days. But these “only 5 extra pounds”, which you hope to lose over time, after a couple of months turn into 10 or 20 kg.
So stop making excuses. Try cycling every day. Or you can just take a walk if you are tired. Stop drinking caffeinated beverages. Add more lean foods to your diet. Eat more vegetables. Cook in olive oil. Drink plenty of water throughout the day. Move more.
You don’t need to completely change your lifestyle. But a few small changes can change your relationship. But the lack of your efforts to change yourself tells your partner that you no longer care about him or her.
5. Lack of attention
To build a successful union with your spouse, you must find a balance between work and family life. Sometimes it just means turning off thoughts of work when you’re at home. You must have free time to devote enough attention and time to interact with your spouse.
Purposefully choose days when you can be together away from home, children, or work. If you keep going down the path, letting your work manage your time, then soon you will only have your work and nothing else.
6. Lack of romance
Another good way to keep passion on fire in a relationship is to never let the romance fade away. I know this is much more complicated than it sounds. But the lack of romance is another reason why passion passes in marriage. So start paying more attention to it.
Dine together by candlelight more often. Snuggle up to each other while watching a movie or TV show. Cook dinner together. Think about how you can diversify your dates and make them more interesting. Striving to be more romantic, even with all the other problems that may arise in your marriage, will make you a happier couple as a result.
You must understand that neither you nor your spouse can be perfect in everything. And any couple can have relationship problems, quarrels and conflicts. But the point is to learn to be patient and understanding with your spouse. With all these reasons for which passion passes in marriage, I came across on personal experience with my husband. But we still stay together. We went through it all. And we still love each other.
So, if you understand that you have one of these problems, this is a great opportunity to take the first steps towards fixing them. I promise that if you put in a little effort, your spouse will definitely support you, and together you can create a happy and healthy marriage.